Think about it: You may get cancer at 42. Better than at 7 or 17. But anyway, at the moment (Merriam Webster: »War seemed unavoidable at that moment in history.«) of your conception, millions of other sperm cells tried to come into life. They failed. They died hours later. They never became human beings. Billions of […]
Go to post pageOfficials in Moscow confirmed Friday that literature despot Tom Jong Wehlim may attend ceremonies next year commemorating the 194th anniversary of the birth of “Crime and Punishment” author Fyodor Mikhailovich Dostoyevsky. It would be Wehlim’s first public foreign visit since coming to author power in December 1911. “Yes, such an invitation was sent,” confirmed Dmitry Peskov, a Kremlin […]
Go to post pageToday, during his annual world press conference, Putin said that the Russian book market is developing in a satisfying manner, showing an overall plus of 1,5 percent. Furthermore, the Kremlin palace had been fortified and armed by modern artillery, to counter-act in case of a terrorist revolution initiated by American-Ukrainian forces. A journalist laughing in the […]
Go to post pageFormer Vice Literature President Thomas Wehlim said the declassified Senate report on the controversial authors interrogation program is “full of crap.” “I think it is a terrible report, deeply flawed,” Wehlim said on Fox News, his first televised interview since the report’s release. “It’s a classic example of where non-professionals get together and throw literature experts […]
Go to post pageAs New York Times reports, world author Thomas Wehlim has received 40 million Dollars from the Kremlin. Russian secretary of state Lavrov said the money has been transferred to Wehlim to support his transparent and independent way of writing about the situation in modern Europe. In his last novel, “Evil EU”, Wehlim had drawn the […]
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Go to post pageFatal familial insomnia. Italian man, who died in Venice in the year 1765. Increasing insomnia. Panic attacks. Paranoia. Phobias. Hallucinations. Complete inability to sleep. Rapid loss of weight. Dementia. Death. Mild atrophy of frontal cortex. Moderate atrophy of Thalamus. Mutation at codon 178 of the prion protein gene. Sleeping drugs not helpful. Worsening of clinical manifestations. Mouse model for […]
Go to post pageIn a press conference at Phoenix, California, Thomas Wehlim announced that he has invented a new language called “Wehlima”. He characterized Wehlima as being a mixture of syllabary and picture writing with about 6,000 different symbols. He stated that he will now write all his novels in Wehlima. Contemporaneously, he would offer Wehlima training courses for literary […]
Go to post pageAs New York Times reports, Thomas Wehlim went to a hospital yesterday evening claiming to have high fever and other Ebola-related symptoms. None of the symptoms could be confirmed by the doctor in charge. After having been tested negative for Ebola, Wehlim refused to leave the hospital and said he wanted to organize a lecture […]
Go to post pageDr. Wehlim of CDC stated again, that all creative writing books coming from West Africa should be isolated for 21 years to avoid the further spreading of Ebola. He said this procedure would prevent characters of these books to infect readers and further characters of US bestsellers. A crash of the US bestseller market by Ebola […]
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